Everyone always asks me how difficult it was to move to another country. Of course there are so many good parts, but what about the bad and the ugly? I'm going to talk about that now in a candid post to all of you!
First and foremost, these are MY personal difficulties and they will not be the same for everyone. Some people struggle more with other areas of their transition, or struggle less.
The first thing I want to talk about is this "Culture Shock" phenomenon we all talk about.
If we're going off the title, I don't really think the Brazilian culture necessarily "shocked" me at all. The culture here is very similar to two cultures I am extremely familiar with (Hawaiian, Sicilian) in that people are very friendly and hospitable, you greet people by kissing and hugging, etc.
I actually have a theory that people who live in warmer climates, closer to the Equator, share a lot in common culturally.
Anyways, adjusting to the culture itself was not really difficult. However, culture shock theory talks a lot about different periods of adjustment. For example, when you first move somewhere, you're in that "honeymoon phase" where everything is perfect. Then after a while, things get a bit tough as reality sets in and you start to realize "wow I really live here." Then at the end, everything normalizes and you feel at home.
This is essentially what happened to me here in Brazil. July felt like a dream. I was new to the country, new to the city. I was so overwhelmed to be living in this amazing place. Everything was so new and fresh. But then later in August and September, the difficulties I had came right in front of me (which I will address now).
1. Loneliness -
Let's not forget that I came to Brazil knowing essentially nobody. The first few weeks it did not necessarily bother me since I was in "adventure" mode and I was just starting to meet new people. But after the first month, I realize I did not have any close friendships and on the weekends I had nobody to hang out with. As a social person, it's very hard to enjoy time alone at times. In addition to this, being in Brazil for a set time, I wanted to meet as many amazing friends as I could and do as many things as I could. Given that this wasn't coming easy, it really bothered me during this period.
2. Travel-
This one ties into what I just said. Given that I am not from Brazil and I am here for a fixed amount of time, I naturally want to travel around and see things I may not get a chance to see again. Here in Minas Gerais, my state, there are tons of historic cities (Diamantina, Ouro Preto, Tiradentes) and fun parks such as Serra do Cipó (which boasts tons of waterfalls and hiking trails). I still have not been to most of them because I cannot find anyone to go with me. 99% of my friends are Brazilian and when you're living somewhere, you're in the mode of "study, work, repeat" and you don't really have time to go on crazy expeditions into the countryside. I wouldn't necessarily go alone because I'm not too much of an introvert and because traveling alone in Brazil isn't exactly the safest thing in the world.
3. Not Saying No -
Ok I lied, there is one difference in Brazilian culture that gets me - and it's this. A lot of people here do not like saying "No." For example, if I make plans with someone for Saturday and they say "yes," there is still a good chance I will get a call on Friday night with them explaining "I'm sorry Mike I can't tomorrow something came up." In order to combat this, I have learned to make tons of plans and whatever falls through, falls through. I have also started doing the same thing actually and I need to stop because outside of Brazil I don't know many places which tolerate this.
Anyways, as time went on, these difficulties gradually disappeared. I started to feel more at home here in Brazil and now it really will be difficult to leave. Actually, some people think I am Brazilian (which I find hilarious). They ask me if I'm from the South where people tend to be more fair. Sometimes I go along with it, but usually if I speak long enough people will hear my foreign accent.
This generally happens anywhere I go though. Except when I go back to Boston or Hawaii it is usually the first two stages on repeat and not the third one. Actually fun fact, when I moved to Italy I stayed only in the first phase.
A lot of people may think that language is a difficult part of transition, but to me, that wasn't really on my list of difficult adjustments. Portuguese is very similar to Italian and Spanish, which I already speak, so during my first month I could basically understand everything even thought my speaking was a little weak. I mean, I did have trouble when I was new here and I had to call school directors and give public speeches - but it got easier with time.
Anyways, that's all I have to say about my difficulties with the transition. All in all, it wasn't that bad and I hope everyone finds the time to visit this amazing country one day.
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